Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
