she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
