I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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