i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
