I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
