he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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