Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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