The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
