I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
