i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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