Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
