And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
