Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
