its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
