I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
