Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
