Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She announced her abortion via fbk
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
