he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
