Where did you get a picture of my penis
home. puking in laundry basket.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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