I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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