I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
