So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
