Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
