that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
