Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
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