I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
