Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize