Nicole vs. Life
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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