your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
