I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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