Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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