Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
