Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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