I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
