never play flip cup with pint glasses
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
