I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
