After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
40s are totally the cure
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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