He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
