all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
pop tarts are not kleenex
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We were destined to go to rehab together
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
my poor anus
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Randomize
