Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
