What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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