life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
