My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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