i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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