Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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