Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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