I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize