real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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