Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
birth control should be required to get into college
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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