It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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